Sometimes, it's on my mind that i'm sleeping by myself, wouldn't it be great to be one of those people who goes to those bars and gets a girl to come home with them, even if it's immoral, to do it just once?
Two of our friends came up here a couple weeks ago and they were both envious of me because i could go up and talk to any girl I wanted and often quite successfully. This is actually an improvement over myself a half a year ago or a year ago. I felt pretty good about myself until one of them ended up going home with a girl. It made me feel like i wasn't that special anymore. I don't know, a lot of this stuff is attitude and I need to work on mine.
Today, I went to the folk life festival. I started talking to one girl on the metro on the way there, struck up conversation in the span of time it took to get from my stop to the smithsonian. I akwardly asked her to a movie since we were talking about movies, she turned me down. Logically, it makes sense to ask out more people, but sometimes it stings. The thing is looking back you regret more the chances you took than the chances you didn't take. Honestly, I don't just ask out eveery girl I see, I could do that, I don't even know why i don't do that more
Whatever, though. On the way back, I talked to a different girl. I kind of targeted her, in the sense that i saw this very pretty girl wearing this dress that was kind of elaborate and she looked like she was about to party or something, yet she was by herself. I was a little curious, why is this hot girl, dressed to go out, boarding the metro by herself at 11 in the direction away from Washington D.C.
So I sit next to her, and just ask "what's your story" and explain my observations. She just giggles and says "not much, going to visit a friend." She turns out to be quite friendly. I kind of looked at her and thought, "she seems kind of snobby, would never engage in conversation with a stranger," and I approached her in a bad mood because I just lost my cell and I don't know, but she was quite disarming and I diidn't feel in a bad mood before. It turns out she went to JMU '07 and we had stuff in common. I asked her if she wanted to hang out sometime, she said sure, but i don't really have a way of reaching her. i don't think it's too hard to get her email since i know where she works and her full name, you never know what will happen, i have to find a way to do it that doesn't make her feel invaded or that i came on too strong, or wahtever.
But the main point is my exchange with this girl made me feel good enough that I really don't feel the need to go out again and try to take some girl home, try to hook up with a girl or even try to get anotehr girl's phone number. i feel relatively entranced by this first girl, and relatively content with the night on the girl front. i think that might be rather pathetic in a way, and it could be a problem because this might not lead to foward progress and i could at a later point feel dissatisfied because i didn't push myself hard enugh tonight.
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